The pain in Spain….

….falls mainly on the grain.

Basically, I'm in Spain for a week, working in the field. I was here at the same time last year and experienced the same problems with my band then as I'm experiencing now. It's got really tight, and I'm struggling to know why. It's taking me ages to drink anything, I've just tried to eat half a banana and had to rush to the toilet to throw up, I can't eat any bread at all, and I'm only managing soup and soft stuff in the evenings. But why? Here are some thoughts:

Flying: Last year, I thought it might be something to do with the flight - the cabin pressure or associated dehydration. But the only things I can find on the web about bands and flying are anecdotal, and relate only to long haul flights, so this doesn't seem likely.
Activity: I've been getting lots of exercise, but I get intense periods of exercise at other times of the year too and have no effects like this.
The food: I've not been having my usual breakfast (half a litre of strawberry milk-based protein shake), lunch is a huge white baguette with cheese or tuna and salad (I don't normally eat bread, and never white), and evening meals are 3-course, large, and very low in fat (I normally have a small, protein-rich meal with a 'normal' fat portion).
Drink: Earlier in the week there is no doubt that I got dehydrated, but for the past couple of days I've been working much harder to make sure I get enough to drink.
Climate: Last year it was very warm, but this year has been much cooler - more like typical British temperatures in October. So this doesn't seem likely.
Medication: I am taking methylphenidate for my ADHD and it is known to suppress appetite - but I wasn't taking this last year.

So the most likely thing seems to be the change in my food and drink habits. I'll be back here again next year and I'm not sure what I can do to change things, to be honest. However, on the plus side, although I'm suffering a little at the moment, this glitch may result in kick-starting some more weight loss….

Last year, I arrived in Spain weighing 17st and 3lbs. I arrived home after one week sighing ten pounds less. Then, without any particular effort on my part, I lost a further 22lbs over the following six months or so. So when I arrived in Spain this year, I weighed 14st and 13 lbs. The way I am feeling at the moment, I will not be that weight when I get home tomorrow. And who knows, maybe the loss will keep coming?

An acid-free night!

I'm back on solid food today after my complete de-fill last Saturday. I've had no problems eating, but then I wouldn't expect to with an empty band. I'm still surprised, though, that I still have a significant amount of restriction, presumably just from the presence of the band itself. I am still getting pretty full after eating small portions. The bariatric nurse said to book an appointment for. Re-fill three weeks after the de-fill, but the way I am going I will be a little frightened doing that, and afraid that my acid reflux will come back.

The news on my acid reflux is that last night, for the first time in over a year, I didn't take any medication at all, and I had a good night's sleep. I plan on doing the same tonight, and see what happens.

So what have I eaten today?

Breakfast: Strawberry protein shake made up with soya milk and water.
Mid-morning snack: A sneaky cake. It was very small, but I was stuffed afterwards!
Late lunch: Weight watchers ocean pie (only 190 calories).
Afternoon snack: Some olives and pistachios.
Dinner: Wholewhat rice with flageolet beans, steamed aubergine and red onion. Followed by a fat free Greek-style yoghurt.

I must say, I really enjoyed my dinner - the first proper meal I have had in more than a week!

Slightly confused.....?

After my complete de-fill two days ago I've had a slightly confusing time. I had expected to be extremely hungry, but I haven't been. I guess there's still enough restriction from having the band, albeit empty, that it staves off the hunger pangs. On Saturday night I had no acid reflux at all, so I had the first decent sleep I've had in ages. But Sunday night I woke up with a nasty dull ache in my chest - about where my band is. It went off after a while and I went back to sleep. But the pain came back with a vengeance about half an hour after I got up this morning. I'm not sure what it is or what causes it. All I can do at the moment is monitor it - but it is a little worrying. All the talk of possibly needing an x-ray on Saturday has got me wondering what could possibly have gone wrong? If anything? I suppose I just have to be patient.

As far as food is concerned, I'm all souped out! My diet has consisted of soup, smoothies, yoghurt and milkshake (not all at once!). At work today, I took a can of soup with me. I hadn't realised until I went to open it, however, that it didn't have a ring-pull, and I didn't have a tin opener! I ended up trawling around people's offices trying to find someone who might have a Swiss Army knife! I found one eventually (thanks Ade!).

Tonight I've already had some mushroom soup (blended to remove the bits), and I'll have a fruit smoothie soon. I'm planning on moving onto mushy food tomorrow, and am looking forward to an ocean pie for tea!

Pre-band fears part 4: Eating cold food

Before I got banded, I read stories about bandits eating meals and taking an age over it. The thing that struck me, was the number of bandits who said that they commonly ended up eating cold food because it took so long to eat a meal that it got cold. Now, I've always hated eating cold food. A meal, for me, has to be served up piping hot to be truly enjoyable. The only times I have sent food back in a restaurant is when it hasn't been hot enough. So you can imagine, I was rather perturbed at the possibility of never again eating a hot meal.

So has my fear been realised? Well there's no doubt that my food does frequently end up cold by the time I've finished it. When I've eaten out with other people I have always finshed ages after everyone else. At home, my husband has usually finished his meal before I'm even one quarter of the way through mine! So, is this eating of cold food the problem that I envisaged it would be? Well the first thing to say is that my provider recommends that if you haven't finished a meal after 30 minutes, you should stop eating and throw any remains away. In theory at least, therefore, a meal will only get as cold as it can get after 30 minutes. The second thing to note is that a half eaten, 'gone-cold' meal can always be heated up in the microwave if necessary. But I have to say that my initial fears have been completely unfounded for another, unexpected reason:

The fact is, now, I eat much more slowly than I used to. This means that I taste and savour the tastes and textures of every mouthful. In turn, this means that I enjoy my food much more than I used to - whether it is hot or cold! Whether or not my food is hot cold is no longer the 'big issue' it used to be. Now, I think much more about the way that I eat, what I at, how much eat and the wonderful tastes if my food. This pre-band fear has turned out to be a non-entity!

Pre-band fears part 1: Eating out

I promised a couple of weeks ago that I was going to post a few articles exploring some of the concerns I had before I got banded - and how those things have panned out. Funny, when I look back at those concerns, none of them were about the surgery itself, any medical issues or worries about complications etc. Here's some of the things that occupied my anxious thoughts at the time:

1. Eating out
2. Being sick
3. People calling me a cheat
4. Eating cold food
5. Not being able to eat enough when I need extra energy (like when on a long hike)

I might think of some more as I work through them. So, here's for the first one - eating out:

A couple of days before surgery I went through a 'cold feet' phase of asking myself was I really doing the right thing? I'd somehow got it into my head that never again, would I be able to eat out. I'd never be able to go out for a meal with my family again and I probably wouldn't even be able to join colleagues eating lunch in the staff canteen! I'm not sure exactly where I got these ideas from, perhaps from the consultant I saw who said I wouldn't be able to eat a 3-course meal again and I'd have to order a starter instead of a main course.

So what has the reality been? Well the first thing to say to any would-be bandits out there, is DON'T PANIC! You WILL be able to eat out! I don't eat out on a regular basis but have eaten out with friends and family groups on a number of occasions since being banded. I guess when I eat out I don't attempt to stick to all of the usual rules, but neither do I completely 'blow it' by stuffing myself silly. A happy medium then, is what I aim for. Typically, I would have a small starter (usually soup but no bread) to begin with. Soup goes down nice and easy so doesn't make me feel full. Then I usually choose a starter for my main course. I did try a main meal a couple of times but they were just too big. I felt bad at leaving so much food and attempted to eat more than was comfortable. So, a starter as a main course suits me fine. A typical starter would be Thai fish cakes, tuna salad, salmon. I tend to avoid 'mixed' food like curry, bolognaise etc because they have lots of unknown fats in the sauces. In the past, I ALWAYS had dessert. Nowadays, my brain wants dessert but my stomach doesn't! I also like to have a sweet taste in my mouth at the end of a meal. So, my solution has been to order a dessert to share with my husband. He's quite a fast eater and I'm so slow, so that he ends up eating 75% of it - which is fine!

So that's what I eat. Now what about the eating process itself? Well, I was never a particularly fast eater before, but now you can bet your last dollar that I will be the last to finish every course! This has been slightly embarrassing at times because people who don't know about my band obviously wonder why on earth I'm such a slow eater. However, I just pass it off with a comment like 'sorry I'm a slow eater' or 'sorry - I've been talking too much'. I also have to be doubly careful not to eat or swallow too big mouthfuls in case I end up getting hiccups, slime or worse. I don't suffer too much with any of these but am more likely to if distracted. Therefore, when I eat out I am particularly careful to focus on the eating process and avoid any mishaps.

I've seen a number of info-bites from bariatric surgeons and associates commenting on eating and drinking while eating out. Most have said that bandits should not try to stick rigidly to separating eating and drinking while out. In fact I again, try to go for a happy medium. On the one hand, it's usually impractical to avoid drinking when you're put for a meal. I generally try to swig down as much fluid as I can before the meal begins, and limit my intake afterwards. On the other hand, however, I have to be careful that drinking after I've eaten doesn't bring on an attack of the slime. If there's food sitting my pouch and I have a drink, one of two things can happen. Either the fluid washes the food through (no problem there then), or it gets blocked, turns the food into liquid mush which only has one way out - UP!! DefinItely to be avoided.

So is it possible to eat out when you have a band? Absolutely yes. However, if you have good restriction you won't be able to eat a normal three meals. You'll also have to eat slowly and be careful not to get distracted. In the weeks coming up to Christmas I have several celebratory meals coming up. I'm looking forward to them every bit as much as I would have before being banded. Looking back to my pre-band fears I realise they were largely unfounded. While what and how I eat are slightly different to what they once were, I can still go out and fully enjoy the company of family and friends. I guess that's it really - the emphasis is more on enjoyment and company and less on food. That's the band for you!

The goodness goes on...

Wow! Not sure what is happening. Two more excellent days where my eating has been totally under control, I've felt real restriction and nit been hungry or craved food at all! Today, for example, I had orange juice and Actimel drink followed by banana and a small cereal bar for breakfast (200 calories). For lunch I had a pre-prepared salmon (200 calories), bulgar wheat and vegetable snack pot. This evening I prepared two veggie sausages, boiled potato and sprouts (315 calories). So far I've eaten about 35% of it and I'm stuffed!

Having a better day - why?

I've had quite a good couple of days. On Sunday I set aside time to do some stepping, light weights training and stretching. I felt so much better afterwards and it gave me a mental lift. Yesterday was a very long, hard day at work but I somehow managed to largely stick to healthy eating. Today has been a bit more relaxed and I've eaten quite healthily today. I ate raspberries, Greek yoghurt and chopped banana for breakfast. It was midday before I was able to eat it and it was slow going. But it left me feeling quite full. For late lunch I ate a cheese sandwich with a tin of Weight Watchers mushroom soup. I got peckish early evening (nothing new there then!) and had a small cereal bar. Then this evening I ate a piece of fresh trout fillet, stuffed pasta and mixed veg (butternut squash, courgette and spinach). I bought the trout Monday, thinking it was salmon! Still, it tasted delish and was lower in fat than the salmon!

I guess today has been better for three reasons:

1. I worked at home so (a) wasn't tempted by the chocolate vending machine at work and (b) was able to take much more control over the timing of meals.
2. I was feeling a bit more positive after a weekend that included some exercise.
3. I started the day a bit later (10am instead of 5.30am) and so ate my evening meal later. I am writing this at 10.30pm, about to go to bed and feeling nicely full!

So can I carry any of this forward to give me continued success? Well I certainly can't work at home every day (chance would be a fine thing!). I could try to make sure I don't have any loose change so I can't use the vending machine. I could also eat my breakfast later in the day (I don't usually feel hungry in the morning anyway) - or split breakfast and have some a bit later. But I honestly think the thing most likely to work for me us making time to do some exercise, walk, go to the gym, swim etc. Because whenever I do physical activity I get a psychological boost and feel so much better physically. I am building up a renewed resolve to put exercise higher up my priority list.

Keep your fingers crossed for me please!

New breakfast plans

I went shopping this evening after work and stocked up on lots of healthy food. I'm going to try a different strategy for breakfast. During the week I normally take mixed All Bran and muesli to work with me. I don't particularly enjoy this breakfast but I suppose I think it's good for me. However, I've thought for a while that I need to have more protein early in the day. Anyway, my new experiment is to have fresh berries, low fat Greek style yoghurt and muesli. I'm going to take the ingredients to work (we have a kitchen with fridge etc) so that they're always available every day whenever I want them. Day one is tomorrow - watch this space.

Good veggies for restriction

Over the past weeks I've been keeping a mental note of what foods, and veggies in particular, make me feel full and work best with my band. I eat quite a wide range of vegetables and have noticed that while some slip down relatively easily, others rake a lot more chewing and leave me feeling full. The best ones include sprouts, mushrooms, spinach (raw or lightly steamed), chunky and lightly cooked broccoli and cauliflower. The vegetables that slip down more easily include onions, soft courgettes, aubergine (unless with skin on - then it can be quite tough), tomatoes, and anything that can be mashed - like butternut squash.

In terms of other foods, bearing in mind I don't eat meat, the main tricks to ensure foods don't slip down too easily are (a) don't overcook food - keep it crunchy and solid and chewy, (b) avoid washing food down by using gravy, sauces or accompaniments that are high in fat. This evening, for example, I couldn't eat all my dinner because it just filled me up. Here's what I had:

Wholegrain (brown) rice
Olive tofu
Mixed broccoli, shitake and oyster mushrooms, and courgettes

I added a little light soy sauce and loads of black pepper for extra flavour and a hint of moistness - otherwise this was a fairly dry meal.

Other good foods are lightly cooked unpeeled baby new potatoes, pasta al dente, any fish that isn't too oily and doesn't come in a sauce, quorn in most forms, various types of beans (e.g. adzuki, black-eye). Sometimes a meal just needs some moisture - a good way to get this without loading on lots of calories is to add some Philadelphia Extra Light (very low fat soft cheese).

What I ate today

Here's what I ate today:

Breakfast: All Bran and muesli mixed, half a glass of orange juice and an Actimel drink.

Lunch: Half a piece of salmon, a slice of wholemeal bread with a thick layer of Philadelphia Extra Light, and some steamed mushrooms and red onion.

Afternoon snacks: Small pear and Alpen Light cereal bar.

Dinner: Other half a piece of salmon, mushroom-stuffed pasta, green beans and sprouts.

Dessert: Muller Light yoghurt.

Total calories for the day 1090.

I still eat all my meals off a small (7-inch) sideplate and use a cake fork. I usually eat in front of the TV but don't allow myself to get distracted. I chew everything really well and take small mouthfuls.

Snacking works for me

I've tried eating three meals per day but I find that smaller meals with healthy snacks in between works better for me. Today, for example, here's what I've eaten:

Breakfast: Mixed All Bran and Alpen muesli, half a glass of orange juice and Actimel drink.
Lunch: Low fat cheese and baked beans on one slice of wholemeal toast.
Snacks: Pear, low fat Alpen Light cereal bar, ricecake with Philadelphia cream cheese (extra light)
Dinner: Salmon, brown rice, mushrooms and green beans.
Snack: Sliced mango. I might have a small, low fat yoghurt before I go to bed.

I often get hungry between lunch and evening meal, so having some healthy snacks mid to late afternoon works well for me. Most dieticians advise against 'snacking' but I think this is to stop people eating biscuits, crisps and other high sugar, high fat foods.

Three courses

We've been out for a meal with friends this evening and I ate three courses! Then I read about someone for whom a two-slice sandwich lasts them all day - and I'm back to wondering again if I have enough restriction! I ate a small piece of quiche with salad for starter, salmon and veg for main and a pannacotta with blackberries for dessert (a bit like cheesecake with no biscuit base!). On the plus side, I had a lovely evening out and enjoyed some wonderful food. I didn't eat nearly as much as I would have done in the past and I am stuffed. We are going for a decent walk tomorrow so hopefully I can burn off some of the extra calories!

Mushrooms are a girl's best friend....

I've started keeping a list of meals that really fill me up. I don't know what it is but I have an awful memory and no imagination whatsoever. If I don't write ideas down I completely forget the following week and get stuck for what to eat. My list is only about three meals long at the moment but I have noticed a recurring theme. Every time my meal includes mushrooms (which is quite often because I love 'em), that meal gets added to the list! They're quite solid and chewy and fibrou, very low fat and low calorie (a whole box of them is only about 20 calories). That makes them very filling and excellent for staying in my pouch. I make sure I get flavoursome mushroms such as shitaki or chestnut, and for added flavour I always pour on loads of coarse ground black pepper and a light splash of soy sauce.

We're going out for a meal this evening - for the first of two times this week (going out on Friday with friends too). I'm hoping to be reasonably sensible in my food choices but we'll see..... at the moment I'm feeling a little as though all the hard work I've been doing lately means that I 'deserve' something nice!!! Perhaps I can restrain myself enough to have just a starter and then share a dessert? Watch this space!

Finding a twin and turning a corner

At last - I have found another bandit who is exactly the same as me!!!!! A lady posted on the UKGastricBand forum all about her typical eating and drinking during the day, and some stuff about her philosophy on the band and restriction - her experiences of PB'ing, regurgitating, iron fist and all that - and she's SOooooo similar to me - it's scary!!

Like me, she has hardly ever done all the nasty stuff like vomiting and regurgitating food. She doesn't get any pain. She can eat anything but in smaller portions and with a great deal of chewing. She also drinks a lot so she's fully hydrated. She has moderate restriction but finds it harder to eat in the morning until after she's had some drinks. Like me, she can eat chocolate and biscuits for England. The foods that she eats during the day are very similar to me - Oatso Simple for breakfast, or a small banana and Muller Light yoghurt. She has crispbreads and protein and salad for lunch and very similar evening meals too! She also loves Alpen Light cereal bars and doesn't hesitate to take a healthy snack if it's needed.

It brought tears to my eyes as I was reading her post because I am sure I've never encountered another bandit who shares so much in common with me. For months I've read stories and had face-to-face discussions with bandits who get loads of pain / iron fist, vomit / regurgitate and can only eat three peas before feeling full (!) and I've never had any of that - so I've always felt as though I just must be a bit weird!!!

But probably the best thing about her post was what she said about her philosphy on restriction and getting fills. She said: "On a bad day I eat chocolate/biscuits/cakes/sweets/lattes but no matter how tight my band I'd still manage them so why have it that tight and suffer even when I'm being good?". Wow - she is so right. For ages now, as you know if you're a regular reader, I've to'ed and fro'ed about whether I needed another fill. But the truth is this: On a good day when I make good, healthy food choices, my restriction is perfect. I can eat anything I like but in small portions and with a lot of chewing. On a bad day, when I make poor food choices and scoff chocolate, cakes, biscuits and such, the band has no effect. It doesn't stop me eating that stuff - I knew it wouldn't and I know it never will - no matter how tight my band is. So what would be the point in making myself suffer with over-tight restriction when I'm being good, to gain no advantage whatsoever when I'm not being good?!

Mentally at least, I feel as though I may have turned an important corner.

Tuna salad nicoise

I found a small gap in my busy schedule (about 50 minutes!) and went out for lunch with some colleagues today. We ate at a restaurant bar opposite my workplace - somewhere we've eaten many times before. They are notoriously slow at service so we pre-ordered our meals. This was a great relief to me because I literally only had 50 minutes to spare. I thought that if they were at all late in serving I wouldn't have time to eat mine! I ordered tuna salad nicoise, which is basically a seared tuna steak with mixed salad including green beans and half a boiled egg. It also comes with a few olives. It wasn't a large portion, but enough to keep me fully occupied for 45 miniutes solid. I finished eating at least 20 minutes after everybody else, but hey, I truly enjoyed my meal and tasted every morsel!! I had to - it needed really well chewing. I had to stop a few times to allow food to go down, but apart from one hiccup (I seem to be prone to hiccupping), there was never any real danger of me embarrassing myself! By the end of it I was somewhere between pleasantly satisfied and full (numbers 6 and 7 on Paul McKenna's Hunger Scale). An hour later, in a meeting, I drank two cups of coffee and tea and followed them up with a couple of biscuits. I don't know about anybody else, but I always feel a craving to have something sweet after eating a savoury meal?

Anyway, it's nearly home time now (shall I go to the gym??) and I'm doing my best to ensure that today is successful - in terms of how much I eat. So far so good - but evening is often my downfall. I did really well yesterday and feel as though I am beginning to get back on track. I also lost 0.4 of a pound this morning - which might not sound much but it's the first hint of me losing anything (apart from my head) for at least six weeks - so I'm very happy with it!!

Whoa what a week!

I'm back! I haven't actually been anywhere, just working 14 hours a day for the past couple of weeks. There's no immediate end in sight, but having worked most of Saturday I'm giving myself the evening off. So, hello again. I hope you've all had a good week. Mine hasn't been brilliant. Working such long hours my carefully thought-out eating and fitness plans gave gone awry. Typically, I've eaten breakfast at my usual time but not got lunch until late in the day. One day I ate breakfast at 7.30am and then didn't eat again until 4.30pm! To be honest, I wasn't even hungry then, because I'd been too busy to think about hunger and was running on pure adrenalin.

However, things have been much worse in the evenings. It's as though all the constraints of the day just go out the window and I just go bonkers! I've been bingeing on chocolate and all sorts of sweet things about every other day. It's played havoc with my digestive system and also with my head. It's made me really down - though I'm sure I'm down partly because of the stress of this period at work. Today has been better, so far. Rather oddly, I was stuffed after one piece of toast this morning, and then again after half a small tin of beans on toast at lunch. In fact, after lunch, I experienced mild 'iron fist' (pain around the band area - behind the breastbone) for the first time! This evening I'm sitting here stuffed again - this time from salmon, potatoes and veg. Oh well, I guess I just need to make the most of it!

Some days I've got loads of exercise from running around at work. But other days I've just sat at my computer all day and got very little exercise. The upshot of my relatively poor eating and exercising this last week is that I'm a pound or two up on what I was. I'm not fretting about that too much - I know I can give myself a bit of slack because of my work situation at present.

I bought a book called 'Breaking Free From Emotional Eating' by Geneen Roth. I haven't had time to read much yet (!) but am expecting great things from it. I'll report back on this as I learn new things.

Been a good girl so far

I've had a much better day so far today. I started out with an early morning visit to the gym. Once at work I had to hit the ground running and didn't gave time for anything more for breakfast other than a banana. Still, that and some drinks kept me going till lunchtime. I'm lucky in having a Sainsbury's close to where I work and so popped along there in search of some healthy food. They do some good healthy choices foods for lunch including a good range of low fat sandwiches, salads and pasta dishes. I opted for a low fat cheese salad sandwich and a low fat Greek yoghurt with crunchy bits and fresh fruit. I ate a Nutrigrain on the way home and have just finished my dinner. I had potatoes, mixed veg (broccoli, mushrooms and green beans) and a spicy vegetable bake.

I may have a yoghurt before going to bed but all in all unfeeling relatively saintly! Having said that, I have found it quite tough today. I've faced some very serious temptation from a half eaten packet of cashew nuts in the kitchen cupboard, from the chocolate vending machine at work and from my husband offering to go and buy a takeaway when I got home from work! Sometimes things are there to make our lives difficult! If I manage to 'keep a lid on it' until I go to bed I'll be very pleased with myself. Who knows, I may even start to losesome weight again?

Breakfast idea

When I was at the support group last weekend I had a nice chat with a lady about what she eats at different meals. I got some good ideas about what I could eat for breakfast to sometimes replace cereal. In particular, I like the idea of having natural yoghurt and mixed fruits. We've now bought some mixed frozen berries exactly for this purpose. I've been trying to eat a banana some mornings in addition to my cereal, because I find I get hungry mid-morning quite often. Having said that I find bananas quite difficult to get down and gave to take them very slowly. If I don't slow down I get these violent hiccups fir a few minutes!! Very embarrassing when you're eating at a desk next to a colleague!!

Breakfast at three.....

Just like yesterday, today was another mad day at work. So mad, in fact, that it was three in the afternoon before I got my breakfast!! And I started work at 7am having left the comfort of my bed at 5.30am. So it's not surprising that my eating continues to yoyo. I ate a Weight Watcher's ocean pie at 3pm and followed this up with a banana and a Muller Light yoghurt. At 6pm I went for a coffee with an equally overworked colleague and managed to stuff down a muffin. I was genuinely hungry at that point. Then on the way home at 8pm I ate a Kitkat! I'm sitting in my easy chair at home now, wondering whether I should eat anything else before going to bed. Although I'm not that hungry any more, my old head is telling me that I haven't had any 'proper' evening meal - and that I should eat something. I think I might compromise and have a piece of toast....

A mincing experience

Last night I cooked up some soya mince with brown rice and some mixed frozen vegetables. It seemed like a balanced meal, with the mince being low in fat but rich in protein. I've had the mince many times before but not since my last fill. While the mince was cooking I'd added a little original Bisto gravy to provide a little flavour. I tucked into my meal - but only got as far as about three small forkfuls. I was just really struggling to get it down. It wasn't that it had made me full - I was still hungry! But I couldn't manage any more so put it to one side.

About an hour later I thought I'd have another go. Then I had a brainwave! I made up some vegetable gravy from Bisto gravy granules (I don't normally use this because it is relatively fatty). I poured this on top of the heated up meal and added some melted cheese. For good measure I added loads of black pepper and a little salt. I tucked in again - this time it went down much more easily! It was also much nicer! I finished the whole lot and was nicely full by the end.

It just goes to prove that drier textured food is more difficult to get down than food that is more fatty. On this occasion though, I appear to have begun by getting the balance wrong and making it too dry. You live and learn!