The weekend before last I spent with my my family down in London. I stayed with my Dad and his partner, but I saw most of the family at some point over the weekend, including my younger brother and sister (twins). I also saw my cousin and my favourite Uncle. I hadn't seen any of them since February so everybody commented on the weight that I had lost. I got loads of really nice, complimentary comments and everyone heaped praise on me over and again. I must say, I don't want to sound churlish, but it started to get me down after a while! I think, in a funny kind of way, it puts extra pressure on me to keep going and not to fail.... As I told my consultant at the Support group this weekend, I continue to look forward at the weight I still have to lose, not backwards at where I have come from. I think of it as though I had surgery yesterday and today is day one of the rest of my life. I know lots of people don't agree with this approach - but that's me - there you are!! So when people say nice, lovely things, I often feel like reminding them that the hard bit is still to come - I can take the complements but I can't be complacent.
Anyway, this morning, out of the blue, I received a card. It said 'Well done - I am so proud of you' on the front - and since I haven't passed my driving test recently or passed any exams, I was a bit confused as to why anybody would be sending me a 'Well Done' card! Upon opening, I discovered that it was from my sister, and this is what she wrote:
"Dear Theresa. Just to say I am pleased with your determination to improve to a healthier lifestyle. I know you have some time yet to achieve your target weight but you will do it. Keep up the pilates! Lots of love, Jayne. x x x". Ahhhh, wasn't that nice?!
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Ah bless. what a great sister....
ReplyDeleteI had the recent joy of realising that I am now the skinny one in my family, and my 2 sisters are now fatter than me (wooo hooo.....). Totally agree with you about the attitude though - I found myself floundering in my motivation after too many nice comments as it fooled me into a false sense of how fat I still am (yes I have lost a lot - but still have a lot to go) and too many flattering comments had a negative effect making me think I was ok at this weight...... took "reality check" holiday photographs and a lot of self examination to get me back into the routine - and I now follow your method - each day is like the start of the journey and that keeps me going. Good post! Kegs x
Hi Kegs,
ReplyDeleteI still have a way to go before I become the skinny one in my family - but having said that, my husband has taken to calling me 'skinny' as a new nickname!
Yes it's a strange conundrum isn't it - it's lovely to get the compliments and I feel a bit churlish complaining about them because people are only trying to be nice and supportive and encouraging. But I too, need that reality check from time to time. It would be so easy to think, from all the compliments, that we've already reached the end of our journey - but even when we get to target weight - it's still a lifetime's work beyond that! Oooohh I'm beginning to depress myself!!
Glad you liked the post - keep up the good work - you're doing GREAT!!
Trees
Theresa, I love your blog thanks so much for sharing with us. I was band 1/27/09. I have lost 77 and I'm at that same point where people say, "you're melting away, you look good" or "how much have you lost" and I always seem to find it necessary to add "but I have 50 more to go" and then they look at me and say, "well, don't get ridiculous with it" but I'm not, I just want to be at a normal BMI and if I lose 50 more that's what I need to lose to be a normal BMI! I just have to refuse to let it bother me when they say that. I like your idea of thinking about it as each day being the start again -- thanks for that idea!! Congratulations on your success and keep up the good work with your band and also the great work on the blog.
ReplyDeleteWell done you for losing so much weight since January. Couldn't agree with you more about wanting a normal BMI.
ReplyDeleteGood luck with youor own journey - hope you keep going down!!!
Trees