Full, twice in a day

It started with the lunch I had so lovingly prepared. The cherry tomatoes glistening and inviting, the cucumber and yellow peppers just crying out to be eaten, and the olives, spicy and chewy, just waiting to be stuffed - into my mouth. I also had some crunchy Ryvita minis and a pot of mixed tuna and cream cheese, to supply my protein needs. I started eating, doing my duty and chewing well. Within a short time, about a quarter of the way through my meal, I began to feel full. The whole meal was only about 240 calories, so not exactly a King's banquet. I have been happily eating small meals without any problem, so was a little taken aback to be feeling full so early. I should have put it to one side and not eaten any more. However, the 'food gene' in my head told me to have just a little more..... I stopped half way through and found the courage to put it to one side, aware of the conflict within me - my head telling me to carry on eating because there's still food on the plate and it would be a crime to leave it..... and my stomach telling my "stoooopppp! I've had enough!!"

So, I ate half of it, and ate the other half a couple of hours later. Then this evening I moved onto my next meal. It was sprouts, wholewheat pasta cooked al dente, spinach and smoked tofu. Delicious (it might not sound it to any carnivores reading this, but to me, a lovely meal!!). It was a low fat meal made of healthy ingredients - and it all fit easily onto a 7-inch side plate (as advised by my provider). The whole meal was about 300 calories. I got about one third of the way through it and began to feel very mild pain behind my breastbone. I paused for a while and ate a little more but at the half way point, quit. I still couldn't bring myself to throw good food in the bin so I've put it in a plastic tub and will eat it for lunch tomorrow!

So what's happening? I had a small aspiration a couple of weeks ago and since then I have been disappointed at the lack of restriction. I have been able to eat anything, including all kinds of 'difficult' foods. This morning, I decided I'd had enough and booked another small fill for Sunday 22nd March (in six days time). Then this afternoon, out of the blue, suddenly I'm getting real restriction and 'full' feelings for the first time. Odd timing, what?! I'm going to see what happens in the next few days and make a final decision on Saturday.