That ol' chestnut

Ages ago I posted, several times, I think, about whether or not to tell people about my band. After much to-ing and fro-ing I finally decided to tell my family and later told some people in my church. I also considerd, at the time, that I might tell one person at work. I didn't have anyone in particular in mind, I just thought it might be nice to feel that I had one ally, as it were, in my workplace. After some thought about who that lucky person might be (!), I made the decision - it was to be Cathy. A woman of the world, always shown to be quite understanding and compassionate, and in small ways has been encouraging when I've attempted to wheeze up four flights of stairs - that sort of thing. Anyway, on the day that I was going to suggest we 'went for a coffee' or something, I found her in a foul mood. She was shouting and swearing about something or somebody - I cannot recall just now. But something told me that now might not be the best time to tell her my woes! I have since discovered, somewhat to my surprise, that she gets like this quite often and is regularly to be found (well, heard, actually) screaming at the latest person who has done her an injustice. So, my decision was reversed and I decided not to tell anyone at work after all.

A few months on from that I am re-visiting that ol' chestnut and thinking how nice it would be to have someone at work with whom I could share the occasional knowing wink or 'nudge, nudge'. I have returned to the question of whom. This time, I seem to have settled for Jane. I get on with her quite well as long as we don't have to spend too much time together! I always made her second choice before because she is a bit mother-hen-like and I was a little worried that she might turn into a bit of a nag, constantly checking up on what and when I was eating, and asking lots of questions. Back then I don't think I could have coped with that, I just wanted to get on with it all quietly and without fuss. But now I am more into the swing of this band, this appendage, this new friend of mine, and I think I could manage. In actual fact, I think I might be strong enough now to tell her straight, that I don't want to be pestered. Unfair though it might seem, if I want to talk about my band, my eating habits or my weight, I'll initiate the conversation - she won't be allowed to!!

So, I have kind of arranged to have lunch with her on Wednesday. I don't know yet if I will actually pluck up courage to do the deed then, or whether I'll regard that as an opportunity to size her up and affirm my choice, if you see what I mean, before aranging another 'talking' opportunity later on. Between now and then I have to work out exactly what I am going to say. I have rehearsed it in my head in the past and in my head it takes about five hours..... so I will have to come up with a form of words that adequately encompasses all the important bits and doesn't take all day! I'll let you know how it goes.