Feedback from a WLS support group

Some time ago I became a member of WLS Info (Weight Loss Surgery Information). They are a registered charity in the UK and provide a web site with a wide range of resources, a helpline, events and a network of support groups across the country. The web site also has a range of forums which are heavily used - you can get advice on all sorts of gastric surgery, pre and post-op. At the moment, I go to a monthly support group run by my provider. It's really great - I can get very helpful advice and share experiences with fellow bandits. However, I thought I would go along to one of the WLS support groups to see what went on. I understood from the web site that they have lectures from experts in the field. And I suppose I was just curious too.

So, on Tuesday this week, I went along to the Liverpool group. It's based at a sports centre on a University campus where the main specialism is physical education! Getting to the centre I passed dozens of student joggers, and the centre itself was extremely busy. I couldn't help think that it was a pity the group was centred here - obese people having to fight their way through loads of very fit, young, sweaty bodies just to get to the room we'd been allocated! Anyway, I arrived. There were about fifty people there - so quite a big group - in every sense of the word!! In fact, when I went into the room, I sat down next to a lady who looked as lost as I felt. I asked her "is this the WLS support group?" (a very stupid question considering the clientele!!) and she replied - yes, but I think you're in the wrong place! This was a thinly veiled reference to my relative lack of size. I think this is the only time in my adult life that I have actually felt truly skinny!!

There was a long delay of about half an hour while a man and a woman tried to get some life from the audio-visual equipment - some sort of technical hitch. Eventually the man spoke and said that everyone who had had surgery three or more months ago should go into another room, and everyone else stay where they were. So with that, I got up and set off for the 'other' room with a bunch of other people. We went to the other room and there was another long delay while chairs and tables were re-arranged. The lady leading the session (she didn't introduce herself) asked if there were any issues people wanted to discuss, or any questions. To cut a long story short, for the next hour, everyone talked over everyone else. There was no order, no chairmanship, no structure, and a great deal of noise. A small number of people dominated the conversation and others (including me) didn't get a word in at all. Suffering hearing loss in one ear, I found it impossible to follow much of the conversation and found the noise level really uncomfortably loud. From what I did follow, I got the impression that most of the people there were bypassers rather than bandits - a lot of the discussion revolved around 'dumping' and vitamins. I was glad when it was announced that we were going back to join the main group.

After another long delay while fifty people queued up to get tea and coffee from a very slow machine, we finally got settled again. I had no idea what was about to happen, but expected something more structured - a presentation perhaps? But I was to be disappointed again. The lady who had 'led' our group asked everyone to say who they were, whether they'd had surgery, and how much weight they'd lost. We went round the group one at a time. It took quite a while and it was very tedious because the room was so big that no-one could hear anyone further than a couple of metres away from them. By the time we had finished this 'round', I had confirmed my suspicion - there was only ONE other bandit in the room!! The rest were either bypassers, or DSs (duodenal switch - not even sure what this is!).

Next, began another 'open' session just like the first that turned into a complete free-for-all with loads of conversations going on at the same time, nobody able to hear much at all, and most of us unable to take part. After twenty minutes of this (and with 40 minutes left to go), I quietly got up and left. The relief - to be out of the noise and into the still night air. All in all, I went along because I was curious, and I came away certain that I would never go again. Not only did I not learn a single thing, but I couldn't hear much and very little of it was relevant anyway! It was very poorly organised and totally unstructured. Now don't get me wrong, I know WLS are a charity and the two 'leaders' are probably volunteers. But this doesn't make it acceptable for me to waste time AND come away with a helluva headache and feeling quite stressed from the frustrating experience.

I'm a glutton for punishment (as well just a glutton!!) though - I may pop along to the Manchester group next month and see if it's any better! Meanwhile, while I cannot, hand on heart, recommend the support groups (well, not the Liverpool one anyway), the web site and all the other things the charity provides are still excellent. As I have often said on here - you live and learn.